Auerbach Central Agency for Jewish Education

Educational Resources

Bibliographies

When Bad Things Happen To Good Children
A Selected Bibliography

Books for Children Grades K - 3

Blue, Rose. Grandma Didn't Wave Back. New York, NY: Watts, 1972.

A ten-year-old girl slowly realizes that her grandmother's memory is getting so bad she may have to go into a nursing home. (Available in video - V-254)

Casely, Judith. Priscilla Twice. New York, NY: Greenwillow Books, 1995.

A child adjusts to a shared custody agreement between her newly divorced parents.

------. When Grandpa Came to Stay. New York, NY: Greenwillow Books, 1986.

When Grandpa comes to his house to stay, Benny enjoys his company and helps him cope with Grandma's death.

Clifford, Eth. The Remembering Box. Boston, MA: Houghton Mifflin, 1985.

Nine-year-old Joshua's weekly visits to his beloved grandmother give him an understanding of love, family, and tradition, which helps him accept her death.

Daly, Niki. My Dad. New York, NY: Simon and Shuster, 1995.

A boy describes living with an alcoholic father, who eventually joins Alcoholics Anonymous.

Fenton, Anne Lobock. Tikun Olam: Fixing the World: A True Story. Cambridge, MA: Brookline Books, 1997.

This mystical, spiritual story, based on the author's experiences during her husband's illness and death from a brain tumor, is designed to help children and families cope with the death of a parent or loved one.

Gellman, Marc &, Thomas Hartman. Lost & Found: A Kid's Book for Living Through Loss. New York, NY: Morrow Junior Books, 1999.

A children’s book, authored by two clergymen, designed to offer counseling for living through death and many other situations where there is a strong sense of loss. Among the circumstances included are the loss of: possessions, competitions, health, and trust.

Grode, Phyllis. Sophie's Name. Rockville, MD: Kar-Ben Copies, 1990.

Sophie Davida Finkle-Cohen thinks her name is too long, but as she learns about her namesakes, she no longer wants to shorten that name to Sue.

Karkowsky, Nancy. Grandma's Soup. Rockville, MD: Kar-Ben Copies, 1989.

Grandma's soup changes when she grows confused and forgetful. A child's perspective of the effects of Alzheimer's disease, illustrated with sensitivity, and told with a subtle appreciation of different responses to a painful situation.

Lanton, Sandy. Daddy's Chair. Rockville, MD: Kar-Ben Copies, 1990.

When Michael's father dies and the family sits shiva, he gradually begins to come to terms with Daddy's absence. Sensitive and positive.

Liss-Levinson, Nechama. When a Grandparent Dies: A Kid's Own Remembering Workbook for Dealing with Shiva and the Year Beyond. Woodstock, VT: Jewish Lights Publishing, 1995.

This book gives children and parents an opportunity for sharing as they come to know more about themselves, their family and the complexities of life and death through writing in this guide/workbook.

Pomerantz, Barbara. Bubby, Me and Memories. New York, NY, 1983.

A young girl draws comfort from her memories of her beloved grandmother. The book uses actual photographs and is written from a child's perspective.

------. Who Will Lead Kiddush? New York, NY: UAHC, 1985.

This book shows how Jewish customs and traditions can give Jewish children a sense of stability and continuity despite divorce.

Spero, Moshe Halevi. Saying Goodbye to Grandma. New York, NY: Pitspopany, 1997.

Compassionately written children's book about a grandmother's death. It incorporates a glossary, bibliography, and notes to parents and educators. Written by an Orthodox psychologist.

------. Saying Goodbye to Grandpa. New York, NY: Pitspopany, 1997.

The above resource, written for the loss of a grandfather.

------. Zeydeh: A Story Guide to Help Jewish Children Cope with Loss and Bereavement. Lawrence, NY: Simcha Publishing Company, Inc., 1984.

This sensitively written book uses the story of a young Jewish boy and his grandfather to explain death, the mourning process, and the circle of continuity to Jewish children. Includes a bibliography for further reading.

Viorst, Judith. The Tenth Good Thing about Barney. New York, NY: Simon and Schuster, 1975.

In simple phrases, narrated by a child whose cat Barney has just died, the author succinctly and honestly handles both the emotions stemming from the loss of a beloved pet and the questions about the finality of death which naturally arise in such a situation.

Wood, Douglas. Grandad's Prayers of the Earth. Cambridge, MA: Candlewick Press, 1999.

A young boy is comforted, after his grandfather's death, by his grandfather's outlook on the beauty of the natural world.

Zalben, Jane Breskin. Pearl's Marigolds for Grandpa. New York, NY: Simon & Shuster Books for Young Readers, 1997.

A young girl copes with the death of her grandfather by remembering all the things she loved about him. Includes the information about funerals customs of various religions for adult readers.

Books For Teens

Gootman, Marilyn E. When a Friend Dies: A Book for Teens About Grieving and Healing. Minneapolis, MN: Free Spirit Publishing, 1994.

Using quotes from others who have mourned the death of a friend, advice and counseling is given to help teens (and others) cope and deal with loss.

Gordon, Sol. When Living Hurts. New York, NY: UAHC Press, 1994.

This book, for both teens and adults, identifies the early signals of suicide. If the reader, or someone he or she cares about, feels sad, lonely, hopeless, depressed or suicidal, the books serves as a guide for what to do and how to seek help.

Grollman, Earl. Straight Talk about Death for Teenagers: How to Cope with Losing Someone You Love. Boston, MA: Beacon Press, 1993.

The author suggests ways to deal with the grief and other emotions felt after the death of a loved one and to discover how to go on living.

Books For Adults

Brener, Anne. Mourning and Mitzvah. Woodstock, VT: Jewish Lights, 1993.

The rituals of mourning and other therapeutic exercises to help with grief and re-entry into life. Based on Jewish concepts but applicable to other interpretations.

Cardin, Nina Beth, Editor. Tears of Sorrow, Seeds of Hope: A Jewish Spiritual Companion for Infertility and Pregnancy Loss. Woodstock, VT: Jewish Lights Publishing, 1998.

Many people who endure the emotional suffering of infertility or pregnancy loss choose to bear this sorrow alone. This book is intended to help provide solace.

Jaffe, Hirschel and H. Leonard Pollen, Editors. Gates of Healing. New York, NY: Central Conference of American Rabbis, 1988.

Intended for hospital patients and seriously ill people in general, their families and care-givers, this pamphlet offers prayers, meditations, and readings from both traditional and modern sources.

Diament, Anita. Saying Kaddish: How to Comfort the Dying, Bury the Dead and Mourn as a Jew. New York, NY: Schocken Books, 1998.

Using the Kaddish prayer recited by mourners, the author guides the reader through Jewish practices at the end of life, from sickroom to funeral, to the week, month, and year that follow. Chapters include caring for grieving children, mourning the death of a child, neonatal loss, suicide, and death of a non-Jewish loved one.

Feiner, Avrohom Chaim. Tehillim Treasury. Brooklyn, NY: Mesorah Publications, 1993.

Inspirational messages and uplifting interpretations of Psalms using midrashim and various rabbinic sources throughout the ages.

Gordon, Sol. Suicide: Prevention, Intervention, Postvention. Boston, MA: Beacon Press, 1971.

Overview of the alarming statistics, especially among teenagers, and of the religious, political and psychological viewpoints on suicide. Includes guidelines for creative response to a potential suicide's call for help.

Grollman, Earl. Bereaved Children and Teens: A Support Guide for Parents and Professionals. Boston, MA: Beacon Press, 1995.

A comprehensive compilation of essays exploring death - from many different perspectives, religious belief systems, and circumstances. The book also offers suggestions for effective treatments and therapies to help the healing process.

------. Living with Loss, Healing with Hope: A Jewish Perspective. Boston, MA: Beacon Press, 2000.

Occasionally quoting from sacred texts as well as Jewish writers and philosophers, this book illuminates Judaism's powerful recognition of the trauma of grief and of the mourner's responsibility eventually to return to the rhythm of life.

------. Talking about Death. Boston, MA: Beacon Press, 1990.

A very sympathetic and helpful dialogue between parent and child; recommendations and supporting suggestions for honesty.

Handler, Jane and Kim Hetherington, with Stuart L. Kelman. Give Me Your Hand: Traditional and Practical Guidance on Visiting the Sick. Berkeley, CA: Congregation Netivot Shalom, 1997.

This compact booklet provides comprehensive advice on performing the mitzvah of bikkur holim, visiting the sick. Includes prayers, do's and don'ts, brief thoughts by American Jewish thinkers, and a bibliography.

Kushner, Harold S. When Bad Things Happen to Good People. New York, NY: Avon Books, 1983.

The classic book, whose author shares his personal story of tragedy, helps readers see the elements of goodness and godliness in the love and support of others.

Lechner, David &, Judith Herb-Mandelbaum. A Candle for Grandpa: A Guide to the Jewish Funeral for Children and Parents. New York, NY: UAHC Press, 1993.

A Jewish funeral director and an early childhood educator combine to counsel parents on this difficult subject. Includes five questions children most frequently ask, and five questions parents most frequently ask, and suggested answers.

Olitzky, Kerry M. Jewish Paths Toward Healing and Wholeness: A Personal Guide to Dealing with Suffering. Woodstock, VT: Jewish Lights, 2000.

This book contains healing rituals, Psalms and prayers to help guide readers to initiate a dialogue with God and to provide guidance throughout the complicated path of dealing with healing both the soul and body.

Stone, Ira. Seeking the Path of Life. Woodstock, VT: Jewish Lights Publishing, 1992.

A series of brief essays and meditations on issues of prayer, spirituality, study and ways to find answers in Jewish thought and ritual.

Weintraub, Simkha Y., Editor. Healing of Soul, Healing of Body: Spiritual Leaders Unfold the Strength & Solace in Psalms. Woodstock, VT: Jewish Lights, 2000.

A source of solace for those who are facing illness, as well as those who care for them. It includes ten newly translated Psalms are included, each with an introduction by a different rabbi.

Wolfson, Ron. A Time to Mourn, A Time to Comfort. New York, NY: Federation of Jewish Men's Clubs, 1993.

Deals with dying, death, and mourning in the Jewish tradition. It helps guide mourners through the varied processes and stages of mourning and also aids those who wish to comfort them. Includes a glossary and selected bibliography.

Wolpe, David. Making Loss Matter: Creating Meaning in Difficult Times. New York, NY: Riverhead Books, 2000.

Using Biblical stories, the wisdom of great rabbis, poets and philosophers, and his own personal experiences as a rabbi, the author illustrates how one can use the inevitable experience of loss as a source of strength rather than despair.

Videos

ALL OF US TOGETHER: HOW FAMILIES CAN INCLUDE CHILDREN IN THE MOURNING PROCESS - V-976

This video provides clear, empathetic guidelines designed to enable teachers, parents, grandparents and other caring adults, to help children cope with death. Presented from a Jewish point of view. It also includes a list of recommended books. COLOR; 15 MIN.; AGE: ADULT. TEACHER’S GUIDE; 1998.

GENERATION TO GENERATION: JEWISH FAMILIES TALK ABOUT DEATH - V-1011

With the help of narrator David Techner, a nationally known funeral director; Rabbi Irwin Groner, a grief therapist; and personal stories of loss, this video helps teachers and their students and parents and their children discuss death in the Jewish tradition. Discussion leader’s guide available. COLOR; 35 MIN.; AGE: 9 - ADULT; 1999.

SAYING KADDISH - V-429

Story of a Jewish family affirming life in the face of death, and their supportive community. Stars Tovah Feldshuh. COLOR; 1 HOUR; AGE: 14 - ADULT; 1991.